Teaching gratitude to my 5 year old
Over Christmas, my son was over excited about the gifts. Mostly the gifts. Actually, just the gifts.
I did not like the development in his attitude towards getting gifts and the association to Christmas. This made me feel very disappointed. Now I see that I probably played a role in his perception of Santa and gifts.
I did some thinking and right off the bat, I realized that as a child, church was an important factor in my upbringing. Mass had a direct link with Christmas, because, after all, we are celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ. As a family, we don't go tot church. We talk about God, how he created us, about his Son, Jesus and it basically ends there. So, my five year old has this notion that Santa is an old man who lives in the North Pole and spends the entire year preparing his gifts according to his list of good and naughty kids all over the world. Great!
So, this brings me to the topic of my post today.
In hopes of saving the day in this situation, and by eliminating the whiff of entitlement, I have found a solution.
After conducting some research of my own, we know that materialism is the desire for stuff, entitlement is the belief that we should have these things without putting in the effort.
In my attempt to reboot his focus
Gratitude reinforces the kindness of others.
As we know, the sense of entitlement stems from a facet of narcissism.
I did not like the development in his attitude towards getting gifts and the association to Christmas. This made me feel very disappointed. Now I see that I probably played a role in his perception of Santa and gifts.
I did some thinking and right off the bat, I realized that as a child, church was an important factor in my upbringing. Mass had a direct link with Christmas, because, after all, we are celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ. As a family, we don't go tot church. We talk about God, how he created us, about his Son, Jesus and it basically ends there. So, my five year old has this notion that Santa is an old man who lives in the North Pole and spends the entire year preparing his gifts according to his list of good and naughty kids all over the world. Great!
So, this brings me to the topic of my post today.
In hopes of saving the day in this situation, and by eliminating the whiff of entitlement, I have found a solution.
After conducting some research of my own, we know that materialism is the desire for stuff, entitlement is the belief that we should have these things without putting in the effort.
In my attempt to reboot his focus
- I will remind him daily in our conversations about the things we have to be grateful for, like new shoes or hot water.
Gratitude reinforces the kindness of others.
- We will plan to do kind gestures for others, to help him focus on others.
- I will help him be content with what he has instead of wanting more.
It's important to limit the number of gifts and to set rules in regards to the use of the gifts in the house.
- Help him express his gratitude by teaching him that there is a person behind the present. By always saying thank you!
A reward system is a lesson on it's own: You don't get something for nothing.
- Initiate a sticker chart to earn points for good behavior.
Presents are tokens of affection, not to be used as bribes for good grades, good behavior, etc.
- I will focus on praising personal successes.
I invite parents to share on there own experiences in regards to the holidays and gifts. Is this an issue in your home?
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